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With Vanessa in power again, it seemed we were in for another boring-ass week of Austin’s Angels controlling the game. I was all set to fall asleep in front of my dumb TV, but King James swooped in and saved us from that sorry fate. Instead, the foursome was forced to start turning on their own. Plus, Double Eviction Night!

Here’s how all the houseguests fared this week. Let the zings begin!

Creeper of the Week (Oh, Who are We Kidding? Of the Whole Season): Austin

With first Vanessa, then Liz controlling the house this week, the hair model from Hell sat back and let the womenfolk do the heavy lifting. Dude was pretty quiet this week … except for asking Liz to be his official girlfriend. Typically, one breaks up with their current significant other before acquiring a new one — unless it was actually Judas who was dating his previous girlfriend the whole time. Twist!

Clear Eyes, Full Hearts, Can’t Lose: James

Between his sweet explanation of how he found out he had a daughter, to his noble (if misguided) attempts to save Meg from the Block, to his hard-won victory in the Power of Veto competition, James quickly emerged as the Hero of the Week. Unfortunately, all heroes must eventually fall, and sweet Jamesy followed his Queen right out the door during the double eviction. RIP, Country Boy.

I Trusted You: Johnny Mac

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Remember last week, when John, like so many eliminated houseguests before him, was straight up gunning for Vanessa, and didn’t care who knew it? Yeah, good times. I get that, as the Jury member who came back, he was one of the most vulnerable players this week. But seeing him completely switch his allegiances was still rough for me. Especially knowing that he, James, Steve, and Meg could have made an excellent alliance and completely flipped the house.

Dead Weight: Meg

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Sure, I love a good red lip as much as the next girl, and we all know Meg is nice, but good taste in makeup and a generally pleasant demeanor shouldn’t be rewarded with half a million dollars. Especially when there are houseguests really busting their butts playing this game. Houseguests like James, who is also cute and nice, but in addition to these features, actually won comps, made big moves, and persevered, despite having to carry Meg week after week. When he volunteered to go on the block instead of her, it was the last straw for me. Girl, do your part or get packing.

Poor Baby: Steve

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Steve, with all his awkwardness and weird deference to Vanessa (which I still can’t quite figure out) is very lovable. I want to protect him from this cruel world, and also let him call his mom when he’s feeling upset. We really got to see Steve’s sensitive side this week, when the stress over choosing between Meg and Julia made him physically ill. Not ill enough to make the right game move (that would be voting to send Julia out the door), but ill enough to make me root for him for another week.

The Scourge That Continues to Bedevil Us All: The Twins

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Vanessa, Steve, and John had the opportunity to break up the twins this week and finally equalize the power imbalance that has been controlling the house for some time now. Instead, they played it safe and allowed Julia to stay in the game. This basically assures that the final four will be Vanessa plus Austwins, and that is a sentence that makes me very sad.

Paranoid Polly: Vanessa

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Vanessa has become an expert at creating fake fights so she has a reason for targeting her enemies. It’s actually a smart strategy — she’s often seen as the victim, at least to the other houseguests. But it becomes frustrating to watch her believe her own hype and intentionally misunderstand other players, just to maintain her own position. Which is exactly what she did this week, when James tried to talk about their different game styles. I’ll always give Vanessa credit for controlling so much of this season, especially because everyone else knows it’s happening, yet still keeps her. But I’d like her so much more if she’d own her deviousness, instead of playing the underdog.

The post Big Brother Season 17 Week 9: King James is Dead, All Hail the King appeared first on Bitter Empire.

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